Ran into this video on Pastor Paul Grabill’s blog Beside the Point. It’s a clip for Life Church. Got me thinking about commitments, covenants and relationships. Watch the video and then I have a couple of comments.
So here are a few thoughts:
1) Commitment is a yes or no question. Sooner or later a halfway commitment gets messy.
2) Sex without marriage is a halfway commitment — at best. Sooner or later a halfway commitment gets messy.
3) One study I ran across found that 8 of 10 couples who live together before marriage will break up before the wedding or end up in divorce. Couples who live together and then get married are 50% more likely to divorce than those who do not begin their relationship cohabiting and only 12% of those who are cohabiting will end up married to each other past 10 years. In other words, cohabitation is not a trial for marriage it is a training ground for divorce. Sooner or later a halfway commitment gets messy.
4) Guys who want sex before marriage are selfish. Seriously. I’m not trying to heap on guilt for past junk, God forgives. But I am saying, “Guys man-up, the lady you are dating is someone’s treasure. If she is your’s you can wait. If she isn’t…don’t be selfish.
Last thought: but most intense and convicting for me.
How many of us are trying to cohabit with God? Aiming for pleasure without commitment. Intimacy without the work. Momentary relationship without the hassle of sacrifice. I’ll follow you for as long as it makes sense and my needs are met Jesus. Because I love you almost as much as I love myself.
But God wants to be our one and only, our radical passion. I know at first glance that seems kind of narrow. If God is my one and only how will I have love left over for my wife, my kids, my job etc. But here is the deal, surprisingly, when I give God my whole heart — love multiplies.
So go for it. Sooner or later halfway commitments get messy.